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Most articles that offer dating tips will tell you what you did wrong on a date by recounting the deadly mistakes that are keeping you single: \u201cDon\u2019t be too fat, but don\u2019t be too skinny.\u201d \u201cDon\u2019t talk about your job, but do talk about your career goals.\u201d \u201cBe interesting \u2026 no, be interested. No, act cool.\u201d Enough of that already!<\/p>\n

The real reason you don\u2019t have the love that you deserve isn\u2019t how you acted on a date. It isn\u2019t because you said the wrong thing or that you smiled at the waiter. It isn\u2019t because you texted the guy after the date to thank him.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Here\u2019s the hard truth: you picked someone who would leave you before you even went out on that date. Before you even spoke to this man, your mate selection mechanism was set on heartache. But the good news is, you can change your \u201cLove Picker\u201d and turn on your \u201cLove Switch.\u201d<\/p>\n

Why do we pick the wrong people? There is a subconscious part of us that draws us to particular people who trigger a familiar feeling. We think it\u2019s chemistry when the fireworks go off, but what\u2019s actually happening is that your inner drama queen is having a field day. You\u2019re bored with the nice guys and crave attention from the man who acts disinterested. Most people think they will never have chemistry with someone \u201cnice\u201d and that could very well be true. If you don\u2019t change your mate selection mechanism, you will subconsciously choose the same heartache every time. You will ignore the obvious red flags, believing, that \u201cthis relationship\u201d will be different \u2026 but nothing changes.<\/p>\n

The key to finding true love is to discover the mechanism in your subconscious (we call it your inner Adam or Eve), which fits like a puzzle piece with potential partners. You don\u2019t have to change how you act, your clothes, your weight, or your personality; you just need to shift your piece of the puzzle. When your puzzle piece shifts, you will see that the men or women you meet will start to change as well. You can have conscious chemistry with someone who wants commitment and love just like you. You will feel the fireworks, but it won\u2019t be followed by a night of Ben & Jerry\u2019s on the couch (unless you and your partner enjoy sweet treats together).<\/p>\n

There are a few ways to change your \u201cLove Picker.\u201d In fact, your subconscious mind is always giving you clues on how to change it. It keeps bringing you heartache so that you can finally make an adjustment.<\/p>\n

You may not have known that you can change it before today, but here is how:<\/h3>\n

1. Break bad patterns<\/h4>\n

Look for common themes in your relationships and figure out where the patterns have their roots. Try to identify the underlying fear you likely have of actually getting close to someone. Face the fear so you can break the bad pattern<\/p>\n

2. Pay attention to your dreams<\/h4>\n

Your dreams are a treasury of insight and information to guide you on your journey to a fulfilling relationship. They speak to you in symbolic language so you need to journal about them and follow your inner guidance.<\/p>\n

3. Create an inner dialogue<\/h4>\n

Work with your subconscious mind by visualizing and facing the part of you that acts as the picker. Ask yourself questions and trust the answers that come to you.<\/p>\n

4. Get a guide<\/h4>\n

Hire a coach that specializes in subconscious work. This is the fastest way to get yourself aligned with love.<\/p>\n

Once you shift your subconscious even slightly, you will see a huge difference in who you\u2019re attracted to and who is attracted to you. You may even notice that more opportunities will show up to meet nice guys, and that friends will come out of nowhere to introduce you to someone worthy.<\/p>\n

The bottom line is that you don\u2019t have to worry about saying the right things or playing the dating game. Your picker, if well-tuned, will always give you the love match you most desire. Isn\u2019t that much easier than wondering if you should wait three days to call him?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You don\u2019t have to get involved in another toxic relationship. Learn how to stop the madness, and create the healthy relationship you\u2019re longing for.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":2268,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[6,11,19,21,25],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/234"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=234"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/234\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2268"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=234"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=234"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/emmerain.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=234"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}